Write On! interviews Author Patricia Sangolo

Patricia says: “I’m a 36-year-old author, originally from the Democratic Republic of Congo, and have lived in the East London suburb of Barking and Dagenham since migrating to the United Kingdom at the age of four. Despite the traumas I faced in my childhood and early adult life, as described in my current manuscript, I’ve managed to turn my life around. Having graduated in International Development and International Relations at the London Metropolitan University in 2017, I obtained my first post-grad role as a civil servant,  followed by a second role, also as a civil servant, within a different department. Today,  as I embark on a new journey as an author, I’m delighted to share my memoir, in which I aim to make readers see life, particularly relationships, through my lens.”

 WO: How would you describe your writing to someone new to it?

PS: Observant and descriptive. I write a lot about what I see occurring around me, society and in my life. I like to understand human behaviour and our relationships, why one behaves in certain ways, and relate it to various things such as religion, culture, trauma or other personal experiences. I write about real people and real stories, as we can all learn from one another. I truly believe we have more similarities than differences and that we can share so much to empower one another.

WO: Tell us a bit about your latest book, Why I Chose To Be A Mistress: My Story.

PS: This book is a memoir about my dating experiences. There again, I wore my observation shoes and analysed my own behaviours while dating. I touched on my childhood and my teens to point out how certain circumstances and situations occurring around those periods influenced my behaviour while dating in my adult years. It’s very descriptive and profoundly describes both good and bad relationships. It describes how deceitful and manipulative I was with men and how I was driven by the hatred I developed for them. It’s real, it’s fun, some parts sad, emotional and very kinky. It describes the transition between me then and me now.

WO: What inspired you to write in the first place, and what inspires you now?

PS: I’ve always been passionate about writing, although I never aspired to become an author. It wasn’t something I thought I would take beyond being a hobby. However, I realised my dating life was pretty much a shambles, including the women I was surrounded by, or the ones I watched on TV, so I started journaling about myself and everything else I saw. Any piece of paper I found, I wrote on. Facebook also became a platform where I shared my thoughts, and my phone had tons of long notes. I did this in my spare time and whenever I felt the urge to write. But, what turned my notes into a book was depression. I was having a tough time in my relationship and was pretty much isolated with my feelings. I couldn’t really speak to people for fear of being judged or, worse, mocked. But I needed to speak; I needed everything out of my system. My laptop became my confidante and I poured my heart out on a blank Word document. I spoke to myself and every other woman through a screen. I knew they could relate to my story one way or another. The rest is history.

WO: The current issue of Write On! explores the theme of ‘Beginnings And Endings’. With that in mind, what do you find easier to write – the beginning or the end? And do you always write the beginning first and the ending last?

PS: I find that writing endings is easier because you have more to write about. It’s easier because there must have been a beginning to have an ending, so I can refer to the beginning to describe the ending with much more detail and information.

WO: What one piece of advice would you give an aspiring writer?

PS: Start! Just start and take one step at a time. It’s a process that will take as long as required; however, as stated in my previous answer, in order for there to be an ending, there must be a beginning first.

WO: Can you tell us anything about future projects?

PS: Since the release of my book, I’ve had a response from readers I didn’t quite expect, with women directly sending me messages on Instagram after reading my book. Many have asked for advice, sharing their romantic dilemmas, while others have opened up about similar experiences they’ve had and thanked me for bringing them to light. I used this opportunity to post a poll asking my followers if they felt we needed a private, intimate space to speak confidently. A space where no subject would be taboo but, more importantly, judgment-free. The poll result showed 100% agreement with the need for such a space. So, one of my projects is to work on something along those lines, through tailored workshops or a members-only website. I’ve also started writing my second book, which I’m taking my time over.

WO: Lastly, if you could choose one fictional animal/creature to be a pet or companion, who would it be and why?

PS: A unicorn, because it represents everything I would like to represent. Good looks, purity, power and innocence. I think I can learn a thing or two from a unicorn!

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You can find out more about Patricia Sangolo by connecting with her on Instagram: @Patricia_Sangolo.

Why I Chose To Be A Mistress: My Story is available to buy from Amazon and Waterstones.

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Issue 19 of Write On! is out now and you can read it online here. Find it in libraries and other outlets. You can find previous editions of our magazines here. 

You can hear great new ideas, creative work and writing tips on Write On! Audio. Find us on all major podcast platforms, including Apple and Google Podcasts and Spotify. Type Pen to Print into your browser and look for our logo, or find us on Podcasters.Spotify.com.

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If you or someone you know has been affected by issues covered in our pages, please see the relevant link below for ​information, advice and support​: https://pentoprint.org/about/advice-support/