By Silviya Vijeyaruban

For as long as I can remember, soul-searching in solitude has – and still does – consume me. A constant cycle of introspection, where I long to uncover deeper meanings about my life and identity at every stage. I search desperately for understanding, of my desires, fears, struggles and truths; yet prior to this, I often found myself lost in a spiralling void, unable to put my feelings into words until I wrote them down: what plagued me, what kept me up at night, all the things I should have said, but couldn’t. The injustices. The yearnings. My Truth.

These, I confess in tear-soaked diaries and jot down fickle thoughts on crumpled-up receipts. I type up profound notes on my phone and I pour myself into dedicated notebooks, left discarded. I rant on paper destined to turn to ashes. I scribble down reminders to be forgotten. I record my messy life, all of it, to start all over again. I pen my emotions as they bubble up to the surface.

Writing is my medium for self-exploration; what flows forth is an extension of myself.

Why Write?

I’ve used writing as a reflective practice: a gentle way to dissect my thoughts, memories and emotions. It’s  been shown, across various studies, that writing activities yield intellectual, physiological and emotional benefits to individuals (Stapelton et al, 2021). The very act of putting words on paper, or typing them out, allows for a kind of clarity – turning vague feelings into something concrete. It can help us sift through the rubble of our minds, shaping fleeting emotions into something we can understand. It’s both an exploration and a revelation – simply, a quiet, yet a much-needed dialogue with the self.

Through writing, I discovered that the words I was pouring out became the foundation of myself; the string of sentences and blocks of paragraphs creating a solid structure within the chaos. The tangled thoughts overwhelming me in silence unravelling on the page; taking shape as something I could finally grasp. The pages became my haven. It was, and still is, a sweet homecoming.

Why Writing Your Truth Matters

Writing is more than a personal refuge; it’s a gateway to authenticity and authenticity allows for genuine self-expression. It’s the art of truth-telling and soul baring: the good, the bad and also the subjectively ugly.  In the first instance, we write for ourselves, peeling back layers of emotion, exposing the raw, unfiltered essence of who we are and, most importantly, as Virginia Woolfe wrote: As I write, there rises somewhere in my head that queer and very pleasant sense of something which I want to write; my own point of view. Yes. Your point of view.

I still remember, over a decade ago, when I first shared my writing. My point of view. Some nodded with amusement, some were indifferent, and one remarked, “Ah yes, Silviya, I too write poetry: The fat cat sat on the mat.”  I chuckle at this now but, at the time, I felt misunderstood. I even doubted whether my writing was any good. Their reactions lingered in my mind; it still does. Clearly. However, it’s never stopped me. It’s never changed my need to write. I wrote regardless. Regardless of it ever being read. Regardless of any validation. Regardless of the ever-nagging imposter syndrome.

Anne Frank wrote: I can shake off everything if I write; my sorrows disappear, my courage is reborn. I wrote because it was a way to offload and discover, while exposing my inner truths. So, write your truths: Write what disturbs you, what you fear, what you have not been willing to speak about. Be willing to be split open.  Natalie Goldberg. Because in that vulnerability, there is power.

Healing Through Writing

Throughout the years, writing has become a deeply healing practice for me; it’s something I’ve come to rely on for clarity and growth. Alison Fallon, in her book The Power Of Writing It All Down, writes: Words help us see ourselves more clearly. They help us remember who we are and what we’re here for. Writing has often been the mirror through which I understand my journey. It’s a space where I can reflect, process, and even rediscover parts of myself I have forgotten.

When I first read Clarissa Pinkola Estés’ Women Who Run With The Wolves, I was in awe. I still am. My gosh, that book has gone through the wars with me! Although the majority of that book is earmarked and underlined, these following words have stuck with me: Though her soul requires seeing, the culture around her requires sightlessness. Though her soul wishes to speak its truth, she is pressured to be silent. Even though I still struggle with speaking up verbally (I’m working on it), I found my voice, loud and crystal clear, through writing. It has become a way to boldly express the truths I might not have been able to speak aloud, to decipher what’s going on internally, a way to understand my environment.

For me, writing has been nothing short of transformative. Psychologist Dr. James Pennebaker’s research highlights the benefits of writing about deeply personal experiences, showing that it can reduce stress, strengthen the immune system, and improve mental wellbeing. Healing through writing happens when we learn about ourselves and, in turn, this opens us up to: The healing power within (Cangialosi, 2002).

What’s even more wonderful is, when I go back and read some of my older work, I can see just how far I’ve come. There are pieces of writing where I can physically feel the weight of the pain I was carrying at the time: the confusion, the pain, the rage. Yet there was also growth, strength, transformation and, most importantly, hope in those words. Writing has not only helped me heal; it’s allowed me to witness my evolution.

Why Share Your Writing?

Writing is not just healing for the writer but also for the reader, who sees themselves within the words. There’s magic in reading another’s truth and recognising it as our own. Writing is like a mirror: reflecting our struggles, triumphs and humanity. Firstly, we write for ourselves, as it has the power to change our lives. Thereafter, we write to connect: to share, to be understood, and to understand others. Paulo Coelho wrote: Writing means sharing. It’s part of the human condition to want to share things – thoughts, ideas, opinions. When shared, it has the power to resonate with others, offering a sense of connection and understanding that transcends individual experiences. It cultivates a sense of belonging, reminding us that we are not alone in our journey.

Final Thoughts: Your Story Matters

We write to understand. We write to be understood. And in doing so, we find meaning—not just in the words, but in ourselves. So, I implore you: Write! Write your truth in all its glory, the good, the bad and the subjectively ugly. Regardless of whether it gets read. Regardless of any validation. Regardless of the nagging imposter syndrome. And remember, when our truths are shared with the world, they have the power to enrich the human experience. So, if and when you are ready, share it!

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References

Cangialosi K. Healing Through The Written Word. Perm J. 2002 Summer;6(3):68–70. PMCID: PMC6220635.

Niederhoffer, Kate & Pennebaker, James. (2012). Sharing One’s Story: On The Benefits of Writing Or Talking About Emotional Experience. The Oxford Handbook Of Positive Psychology, (2 Ed.). 10.1093/oxfordhb/9780195187243.013.0059.

Stapleton CM, Zhang H, Berman JS. The Event-Specific Benefits Of Writing About A Difficult Life Experience. Eur J Psychol. 2021 Feb 26;17(1):53-69. doi: 10.5964/ejop.2089. PMID: 33737974; PMCID: PMC7957853.

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